After a break up your first thoughts may be how you are going to get them back. However, to be successful at getting your ex back it is more important to know what not to do because all your best efforts will be useless if you commit one of these six cardinal mistakes.

Crowding them

Since you are used to seeing your ex daily it will be easy to make sure that you schedule your day and social life to include many run-ins that include your ex. However, they are never going to miss having you around if you are always there! Plus, neediness and co-dependency are huge turn-offs, so it is actually better if you avoid them for a while.

Remaining friends

While it is tempting to remain friends if the offer is on the table, you will only be giving them access to your emotional support without having to do anything in return. It may be painful, but it is in your best interests to stay clear for a while. If you two are always together they will never get the chance to miss you which needs to happen if you want them back!

Trash talking

Every time you complain about your ex you are giving them another reason to dislike you. Would you want to get back together with someone who is always putting you down to your friends? While its a lot harder to stay positive, you want every thought they have of you to be positive, so keep your opinions to yourself no matter how much you hurt.

Drunken phone calls

You know what you are really saying if you send a drunken text or leave a drunken message? I am incapable of being alone and need you back in my life so that I do not drink myself to oblivion every night. Does that sound like someone you want to be with? Retain some of your self-dignity and put down the phone no matter what the last six shots are telling you.

Major appearance changes

Updating your appearance is one thing, but completely altering your look can make you appear slightly unglued. It is actually helpful to appear attractive if you want your ex back, but change too much and you may erase some of what originally attracted them to you.

One night stands

Jealousy is powerful tool when used correctly. Flirting casually can cause your ex to rethink why they dumped you. On the other hand, a one night stand simply degrades your worth in their eyes and sends a clear signal that you cannot restrain yourself. Thus remember, flirting is one thing, but if you take it to the bedroom there is a good chance you will ruin your future chances of reconciliation.

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