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Are You Dealing With a Petty Tyrant?

by DonAngelica Silva

posted in Relationships

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Have you ever had a person in your life that annoyed you to no end and made you seriously wonder how long you'd be willing to spend locked away in solitary confinement for simple assault? My friend, what you're dealing with is a petty tyrant. These people are usually in some sort of position of authority or just someone you're in a relationship with where you're forced to interact with them for some unreasonable amount of time, like your boss, parent, teacher, spouse, teenager... the list goes on. You're having a peaceful day, where your favorite song is playing on the radio, the birds are chirping outside and then this tyrant shows up and cuts the fool and now you're popping Tums because your stomach is all tied up in knots, your forehead starts throbbing and the next thing you know your day is shot. Believe it or not, you should consider yourself honored that this petty tyrant has crossed your path.
Before you throw your computer across the room, follow me on this. Why is it that the petty tyrant bothers us so much? Do we really care about their childish rants, or ignorant comments that clearly come from the land where people sleepwalk all day? Not really. What's happening is that their comments, triggered by their low self-esteem, have implied that we are not important. When we feel our self-importance challenged we immediately want to defend ourselves. Most people don't realize that trying to defend yourself consumes a whole lot of energy and brings us the greatest amount of unhappiness.
Don't get me wrong; knowing that you are important is very important. However, having to prove your importance is a definite weakness. Make no mistake, a higher power is calling you to mastery or this tyrant would not have manifested in front of your eyes. Everything that comes to your attention has been sent to teach you something. Everything!
Master this lesson and the person will disappear. Even if the disappearance just means that you are no longer bothered by what they say or do. Here we go...
1 - First of all, 'You Are Important'! Let's get that out of the way so it never needs to be said again. There is nothing else in Gods creation like you. Nothing!
2 - Thank the teacher! As soon as the petty tyrant shows up, before they've even had a chance to get started, silently thank this teacher for giving you the chance to practice your self-mastery.
3 - As the petty tyrant steps on the gas, sit with what you are feeling inside. I can't emphasize enough how important it is to just allow yourself to sit with the way you feel inside. It will feel uneasy but allow it. This allows you to see that feeling bad won't kill you. It's an emotion in your body that will pass if you allow it. Bless the bad feeling and allow it to go.
4 - Never react immediately! Use timing and self-control to bring discipline into your life. Take as long as you need to think about how to respond to your little tyrant teacher. This shouldn't be hard if they're doing the same annoying things all the time as most tyrants do.
5 - Never take yourself too seriously and please don't ever take the petty tyrant seriously. Remember, kings and queens always had a fool for their own amusement.
Practicing self-control will bring you peace. Waiting for the perfect timing will allow you to think about whether this situation requires you to challenge the person to create boundaries, simply come back with a witty remark, or remove yourself from the relationship altogether.
In the end, you'll be a self composed master unmoved by things outside yourself. Thank you petty tyrant! We're honored by this blessing.
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