Your Marriage Quotes Will Haunt You The Rest Of Your Life

When it comes to your wedding day, just sit down and shut up. This is good advice for both the bride and the groom, especially if you know that your partner has a photographic memory. And almost all marriage partners will suddenly develop a photographic memory for this one shared event in your lives. They won't remember where the keys are, where the car is or where they've left the children, but they will remember all of your marriage quotes until the day the both of you are dead.

Don't Be Cute

When you are thinking about what possible harm a funny marriage quote can do, think again. You are getting married. This is no time for thinking that anyone in the wedding party will be able to understand irony, satire or other subtle forms of humor. Quite frankly, a wedding is no time for thinking. Just stand where you are supposed to, repeat what you're supposed to repeat and then KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT.

Also, have a real long talk with your bridesmaids or your best man. They will surely have collected all kinds of incredibly funny and poignant marriage quotes like, "My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met." (Rodney Dangerfield) or "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury," (Groucho Marx).

They will not only want to use these marriage quotes at the reception, but most likely during your trip down the aisle. They will especially want to use anything negative you might have said in your days in the single life in order for a cheap laugh and to make you blush.

These anti-marriage quotes will come back to haunt you for the rest of your married life. Your partner will not let you forget them. "You said WHAT???" will echo down the years like an event in quantum physics which is thought exist eternally. Make a grave impression on your prankster-pulling best man or bridesmaid to keep the conversation sappy and appropriately romantic on the wedding day.

What You Should Say

If, on your wedding day, someone notices that you are very quiet, don't be tempted to blurt out a Minnie Pearl marriage quote like, "Marriage is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot." You might really be dying to say something like this just to break the tension. Don't.

Instead, lie through your teeth and say, "I never thought it would be so intense. I don't know what to say," and say it ALL DARN DAY, through the reception until the clock ticks over until midnight. Your future happiness with your partner rests on this.