How Much Of A Problem Are Eye Contact Problems?
Some people have an extremely hard time making eye contact with anyone as they are talking to them. In Eastern society, an eye contact problem is when you are looking your superior or an older person in the eye. That is considered rude. You are supposed to look down at your feet when communicating with someone you respect. However, in Western society, an eye contact problem is when you do NOT look who you are talking to in the eyes, or at least the face.
You Lookin' At Me?
It is been said that the eyes are the windows of the soul. Looking into someone's eyes can make you nervous for various reasons. Perhaps you are worried that they will see your naked soul as clearly as a naked body. Sometimes, people have such incredibly beautiful eyes that you just can't help but gawk at them. Although it is an overused cliché, "lost in your eyes" is very aptly put.
In some species, staring is considered a direct threat - or an invitation to mate. This is still seen in domestic dogs. If you want to really annoy your dog, stare at him or her. Soon, the dog will look away. If you know your dog has an aggression problem, please don't try this - it may provoke the dog to attack. Since we humans are another species of animal, traces of behaviors still remain. Sometimes they manifest as eye contact problems.
Staring Is Rude
We have probably been taught as children that staring is rude. In some ways, this is rude. Gawping at the only person in a wheelchair on the bus can be slightly awkward for the one that is being stared at. Some people consider staring at someone else's feet to be okay, but staring at other body parts is not. People can have eye contact problems with those they find sexually attractive in some way.
For example, this writer has been fortunate enough to meet her hero, Peter Gabriel, the British singer-songwriter, writer of the song "In Your Eyes," coincidently. One of Gabriel's most memorable features is his large blue eyes. If there is such a thing as a perfect pair of blue eyes, he's got them. He also seems to know the effect his eyes have and will stare directly into yours.
When I realized that I was going to meet Gabriel, I realized I had to deal really fast with the eye contact problem. I could only look in his eyes for about a minute at a stretch unless I wanted to look like a mute moron. I'd have to flick my eyes away, or at the top of his head, or at his mouth or his eyebrows, so at least I could have a brief conversation with him that hopefully he would consider socially acceptable.
