What You Would Find In The Ideal Home Security Store
Your average home security store usually has the same items as all the rest. Alarm systems, hand guns, and menacing signs that warn potential intruders about the maiming capacity of the family Chihuahua. But the ideal home security store would have so much more and it would probably look more like an army surplus store really run by the army than anything else. The ideal home security store would have things that can be used for practical home security purposes and things that any home would automatically be safer just for having on the property. I can just see my ideal home security store and it carries everything I would want for home security.
The first thing you would be able to rent from my ideal home security store is a ninja home security service. What better way to protect your home than with an army of ninjas? Think of the perfection of the idea. You would never see or hear them until you really needed them because they are ninjas. When you do need them they would remove the criminal quickly and quietly because, well, they are ninjas. You can also stop that annoying neighbor you have from borrowing all of your tools and walking into your house without knocking because your new ninja security team can go to his house in the middle of the night and super glue him to his bed and you would never hear from him after that. Ninjas are cool.
Next Up Would Be The Heavy Artillery
My home security store would sell machine gun nests that you can easily install anywhere on your property. At night they don't look too menacing to potential intruders until the intruder hears that machine gun lock in its ammo and make that loud clicking noise like it is ready to fire. One quick warning blast over the intruder's head and you will never hear from that intruder again.
My ideal home security store would not carry security alarms that called the police or made that loud squealing noise. My ideal home security store would carry alarms that just screamed like someone was being stabbed whenever an intruder tries to open a window or door. Throw in the occasional "run for your life" in the soundtrack and you won't hear from that intruder ever again either. I really should open that store before someone else steals all my completely awesome ideas.
